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It's a Jersey thing. Beauty Care

I have never actually watched an episode of Jersey Shore, but that didn't stop me from gleefully playing with the Jersey Shore Nickname Generator. Stick in your given moniker, tell the nice generator if you're a boy or a girl, start working on your accent, attitude, and tan, and it'll tell you what your name would be if you were a Jersey Shore character.

You may now refer to me as - wait for it - "The Opportunity".

Himself's Jersey Shore name, meanwhile, is "The Prince of Paramus".

Er... right.

Even the dog's ("B-Train") is better than that.

{image source: South Park Studios}
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