Knickers, Monica! Beauty Care

So, I've waxed lyrical about the tights in Topshop before, but I've discovered lately that they also do a really excellent line in girl boxer-stylee underwear! Less visible under figure-hugging clothes than thongs and far more comfortable and, sorry to sound like my mother here, a lot warmer, I've been on the hunt for the *perfect* version for quite some time. See, what lots of people who don't get completely obsessed with finding the best of the best of everything don't realise is that not all girl boxers are created equal. Some of them call themselves girl boxers, but actually they don't have enough material in them to cover a postage stamp and wind up being more like those fancy French knickers that cut across the cheeks of your bum.

Now you just know that anything Gerry Ryan's a fan of can't be a good idea, and while these look great on the girls from Victoria's Secret they are inclined to be less flattering on an Irish arse that hasn't seen either the sun or a lick of false tan in 6 months and hasn't seen a gym in maybe twice that length of time. Oh yes, and they're wicked uncomfortable and actually create what may be The World's Worst VPL, and the versions that masquerade as girl shorts are no better.

The other problem is that it's hard to find versions of these that actually run true to size. The genius people at Topshop, however, have sorted all these issues and come up with what I think must be the ultimate in girl boxers. Comfy. Cheap (I have picked up block colour pairs of these laddies for €1.50). Cute.

Done.

Well, not quite - because you need to be careful not to get sidetracked by the novelty character underwear on the racks alongside these offerings. Oh sure, that Wonder Woman / Little Miss / Muttley from Wacky Races knickers looks like a girl boxer, but if those words are not printed on the waistband, you can be nearly guaranteed that it has seams in, er, uncomfortable places and will cut off circulation to your legs.