Guess who`s back...back again...Beaker`s back...tell your friends...
ooooooooK now that I`ve successfully given y`all a slim shady earworm,
lets get down to business. What has brought me out of retirement to
holler at all my girls? Shellac. Holy Balls people.
I resisted this ish for so damn long. I kept tellin myself people
were nuts, it couldn`t be ALL that awesome. You won`t hear me say
this often, so adjust your monitors so you can read this well: I was
effing wrong! Hell, you may wanna even take a screencap of that ish
right there. It happens like, I don`t know, once a decade.
Anyway back to the good stuff. Shellac. Now y`all, I`m gonna tell
you, I do NOT "use as directed". Pssssh, eff that. Let me tell you
why I love this stuff:
1. Bye Bye Staining.
Most the time, when I`m using Shellac, I do the Shellac base
and top coats, and then paint whatever the hell I want over it. Cause
let`s be honest. Most of the Shellac colors are JANK. Admit it. You
know that`s what has kept you from Shellac-ing so far, isn`t it? Well
base/top then whatever nail polish I want over it has solved the
problem I had with the jacked boring colors. And it had a surprise
benefit. My staining is le gonzo. Not Kellie Gonzo, no I mean
arrivederci. Vamoose. Au revoir. Dont let the door hit ya... ok, ya
got the point...
2. Bye Bye VNL.
The boring beige Shellac color = perfect underwear for polish
you can`t get rid of VNL with, no matter how many coats you do. OH
yeah Glitter in the Air, I`m lookin at YOU.
3. Ridiculously long wear
I REALLY break the "use as directed" rules here, and let me be
CLEAR: THIS IS NOT ADVISED BY CND! If you follow my lead, and catch
your fingernails on fire or something, you can`t sue CND or me because
I just told you crazy girls its not allowed by CND. So, what do I do?
If you`re like me you have a boatload of HTFs you find yourself
reluctant to wear because you spent a stupid amount of money on them
and they chip within a day (yes, I`m looking at you Id). Well, I
decided one day that risking catching my fingers on fire was worth it
if the experiment actually worked. What kind of Beaker would I be if
I wasn`t willing to risk catching myself on fire? I did my usual
Shellac base/color/top, cleaned off the sticky layer, and painted on
my pretty htf (230, actually, over Shellac Fedora. Ballllller combo
btw) I let 230 DRY COMPLETELY, then....I put Shellac topcoat back
over 230, cured it, removed the sticky layer...and that bad bish
lasted through tubing down a river, camping, cleaning without gloves
AND rearranging furniture. I finally got so sick of it I ended up
taking it off. Because I had another idea...
4. If that worked...what about...
Yep, you guessed it, my next experiment was Shellac base/top +
regular nail polish + shellac top.
This had dicey results. Sometimes, its KILLER. Lasts forever
just like Shellac. Other times, it peels in a couple days. It
doesn`t seem to agree with frankens or serious holo (Gosh Holo chipped
in a day, after a TON of trial and error to get the shellac to not
dull the holo). However, I wore Zulu for 4 days with no problems,
before I got sick of it and had to change.
5. This stuff stands up to water!
I Shellac`d my toes last weekend before going on the river, and
not a single chip or peel, after 10 hours in the water. Tubing.
Fishing. River Rodeo. I did manage to scratch the shiny layer on one
toe because I went foot first into a massive rock. Another plus, I
had a massive toe injury about a month ago, and had a toenail ripped
off. I`ve just been Shellac`ing where the toenail would be normally.
You can`t even tell I`m missing a nail AND it stayed intact through
river day. That is pretty much the equivalent of a nail miracle.
Now, I know you`re all thinking Shellac is EXPENSIVE to have done,
and only available to Pros or on ebay for stupid prices. Well, as
long as you have a local Sally Beauty, fear not. Because Sally now
has Gelish. And, Gelish has wicked better colors than Shellac.
So, short recap: Shellac rocks. Its better than cupcakes. Maybe.
Unless its a bacon cupcake. Then nothing is gonna top that bish.
Shellac has crap colors, but Gelish even has killer hex glitters.
Don`t use like I do, but I know you`ll do it anyway so if you catch
your fingers on fire or something crazy CND, myself, and Ernie`s blog
are not accountable for your crazy experiments. Lastly, click this
text to see how much Beaker loves you...
[Note: Thank you to my wonderfully, beautiful test tube sister for this post and if any of you even think about calling me Ernando, I will bring a wrath down upon you that will make your great grandbabies cry. She is the ONLY ONE who can call me that other than C-note.]