Tamara Mellon, would you ever ChUGG off. Beauty Care

I am in bad need of a sensible pair of walkable-innable winter boots to replace my fake UGGS, but I would have to be blind or drunk or both simultaneously for these abominations to feature on my shortlist.

source: NET-A-PORTER

They might look like something you'd expect to pull out of the bottom of a bargain bin in Heatons, but actually they're the result of a collaboration between UGG and Jimmy Choo.

Not since your woman Ciara started wearing Irregular Choice shoes on The Apprentice have I been so put off a brand.

I think it's fantastically ironic that these boots have been dubbed "ChUGGS" since that's exactly what I wanted to do when I saw them first. If they don't make you lose your breakfast, you'll find them exclusively at the Jimmy Choo boutique in Brown Thomas' Shoe Rooms where prices start from €495. Best get your skates on if you fancy a pair, though, as they're a limited collection.

Thank God for small mercies.